Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
