wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
