Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
