Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
My vagina just recognized that song.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
