I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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