Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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