Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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