I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
