this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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