Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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