Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
