He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
