get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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