C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
