Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(434): View more from Virginia

ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl

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(410): View more from Maryland

Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(

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(847): View more from Illinois

he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.

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(630): View more from Illinois

you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page

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(765): View more from Indiana

I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.

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(562): View more from California

My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.

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(585): View more from New York

High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.

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(757): View more from Virginia

well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.

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