Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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