Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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