In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
So many bounce houses so little time
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
