I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
