We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I am naked and annoyed.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
