Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
