She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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