come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
