Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
