Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
