omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
