Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
FUCK WHALES
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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