i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
