You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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