Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
