Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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