windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
