You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
