She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I want to make a zoo with you.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
