We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
You ate ashes out of my bong
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
