u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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