It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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