Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
