i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
