i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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