Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
just tell him i said nine months
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
