I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
