Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
