so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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