Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
