you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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