You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
