let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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