And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
operation harelip BJ is a go
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
