Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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